Ms. Stewart and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

It all started with a broken coffee maker. A five a.m. premonition of what the rest of the caffeine-less, sleep-deprived day would bring. I wanted to cry while standing dejectedly in front of my coffee-less coffee maker, coffee cup in hand, longing for its dulcet drops of caffeine magic. Alas, my longing availed naught. And I stumbled away in a state of tired-like zombieness. Watch out world.

After my morning struggles, while driving to school, I got stuck behind the train. Which of course was traveling about 3 mph. Thankfully, I arrived at school just in the nick of time. It's nice to have at least some thankful moments in the day.

The morning progressed through a series of events that left me wondering if I should become a teacher and if I really have what it takes to teach a class of my own. I won't go into specifics. Suffice it to say that my students almost left me in tears and I left feeling slightly like a failure and incapable of becoming the inspiring and loving teacher that I so long to be. 

Is this what it feels like to be a teacher? Constantly trying to be inspiring and effective while doubting that you're actually doing any good? If so, I'm definitely apprehensive about the future. 

Nevertheless, this is the month of thanksgiving, and I'm working on cultivating more of an attitude of thankfulness and joy in my life. Below are lists of the bright moments in the day. Moments for which I am incredibly thankful.

Thankfulness:

- One student telling me that I am "sooo pretty."

- A funny little first grader asking me the question of, "why are you so small?" 

- Seeing one student have a "light-bulb moment" and knowing that I helped him attain it.

- Finishing the Old Testament in my Bible reading plan.

- My two minutes of peace during my prayer at lunch.

- Welcoming a student back to the class after he had been out for a week because of illness and seeing how genuinely happy he was to be there.

- Good conversations with another senior methods student at my school.

- Being done with the bilingual generalist exam.

- Two weeks till Thanksgiving break.

- My sweet Ryan and the fact that I get to see him in four days!!! 

Yes, I am blessed.
Maybe my terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day isn't so awful after all.

"But for you who fear my name, the sun of righteousness shall rise with healing in its wings. You shall go out leaping like calves from the stall." - Malachi 4:2